Indy IV
When Raiders of the Lost Ark first hit theaters, critics were largely kind, and most noted (and tended not to mind) its derivative nature–as Vincent Canby wrote in the New York Times back in ’81, “It is an homage to old-time movie serials and back-lot cheapies that transcends its inspirations to become, in effect, the movie we saw in our imaginations as we watched, say, Buster Crabbe in Flash Gordon’s Trip to Mars or in Sam Katzman’s Jungle Jim movies.”
The problem with the new Indy movie is that it’s derivative of the old Indy movies. Every scene is reminiscent of another, better scene from an old Indy flick. Some examples (and spoilers) after the jump.
Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, just like Raiders, features a jeep chase between Indy, his compatriots, and sneering bad guys holding an artifact that will determine the fate of the Earth. But whereas the first car chase was done entirely with practical effects, this one appears to have been shot on a green screen–fake jungle is no substitute for real desert.
Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, just like Temple of Doom, features a descent into a bug-infested ruin. While the floor of the Indian temple literally crawls with bugs–“feels like walking on fortune cookies, Indy!”–this film throws in a few scorpions and expects us to be grossed out.
Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, just like Last Crusade, features an oblique reference to the Ark of the covenant. The reference in the first was kind of funny, and clever (it’s a quick moment, for those who have forgotten, while in the Venice catacomb). The reference in this film feels kind of forced–the first ten minutes or so are set in that mysterious warehouse shown at the end of Raiders, but instead of searching for it (even though it’s right there! Right there!), the Godless commies are looking for an alien corpse.
And the ending…the ending is just incomprehensible. In Raiders the Nazis open up the Ark without understanding its true power, the lead Nazis face melts off; okay, fair enough. In Kingdom…a crystal skull is brought to an ancient South American city, it’s placed onto a crystal alien skeleton, the lead Commie catches up and demands to know the aliens’ knowledge…so they blow her mind? Or something? Anyway, it’s totally derivative of the ending of the first movie, except it really sucks.
Kingdom of the Crystal Skull isn’t a bad movie, per se–it has its moments, and I enjoyed Shia’s performance, as well as Harrison Ford’s. But it’s certainly the worst in the Indiana Jones series.