Book Review: “The Soul of Civility” by Alexandra Hudson

The Soul of Civility: Timeless Principles to Heal Society and Ourselves (St. Martin’s Press, 2024) by Alexandra Hudson, 416 pgs. 

Our shared society is stressed. Many people, myself included, often feel the growing harassment and lack of courtesy, the outright derision aimed to disarm any act of kindness. It is not so much death by a thousand cuts as by a million social interactions undermined by vast changes and stresses on how we relate to others. 

And while some may retreat from civil society, understandably preferring the comfort and recesses of home, voices are rising to turn the tide. With them, these organizations, writers, and activists bring time-honored strategy and innovation, and most of all, they bring hope. 

In her compelling new book, The Soul of Civility, Alexandra Hudson takes readers on a profound journey through the annals of history to explore how timeless concepts of civility from the Ancient Greeks to Enlightenment Thinkers offer a much-needed grounding for our fragmented society. 

A Timeless Framework for a Modern Crisis

The third part of Hudson’s book, “Civility in Practice,” serves as a powerful framework for community engagement and civil society. Here, Hudson doesn’t just theorize about civility; she provides actionable steps for strengthening our democracy through day-to-day interactions. It’s a call to arms for those who believe that societal transformation begins at the individual level and extends outward into the community.

At a time when many people feel bitter, stressed, and angry due to inflation, housing shortages, and intense polarization, Hudson’s optimistic tone offers a refreshing respite. She acknowledges the myriad challenges we face—from the economic to the social—but insists that there is hope. This is particularly poignant as we continue to grapple with the lingering effects of the pandemic, which have strained our social relationships and left many feeling isolated and fearful.

Hudson expertly weaves historical insights with practical approaches, examining civility from various angles—civil discourse, community involvement, and personal responsibility. Her exploration is enriched by personal anecdotes and time-honored traditions that bring these concepts to life.

The book’s examination of civility in history is both enlightening and empowering. Hudson digs deep into the works of ancient philosophers like Aristotle and modern thinkers like John Locke, demonstrating how their ideas remain relevant today. These timeless principles serve as a guidepost for navigating the complexities of modern life.

Civility as a Skill

Hudson further reframes civility not as an innate trait but as a skill that can be cultivated. This approach removes the stigma around perceived deficiencies in civil interactions and invites everyone to actively participate in the process of becoming more civil. By outlining exercises and practices that enhance our ability to communicate respectfully, she empowers readers to take ownership of their role in societal change. This has substantial implications for our daily lives, encouraging proactive engagement rather than passive frustration with societal ills.

One of the key themes in Hudson’s work is the importance of transformative conversations within our communities. She emphasizes that fostering a culture of open dialogue and genuine listening can bridge the divides that often separate us. By encouraging individuals to engage with differing perspectives, Hudson illustrates how meaningful exchanges can lead to understanding and empathy. This principle is particularly relevant in today’s context, where polarization is rampant, and many feel unheard. The book provides practical tips on how to initiate these dialogues, from choosing the right environment to framing questions that invite discussion rather than debate.

Engaging the Next Generation

Looking toward the future, Hudson also focuses on the role of education and mentorship in instilling civility in younger generations. By integrating lessons on civility and community engagement into educational curricula, we can equip young people with the tools they need to navigate their social landscapes thoughtfully. This investment in the next generation, according to Hudson, is crucial for fostering a more civil society and ensuring that the ideals of civility endure.

The Soul of Civility urges us to reflect on our individual contributions to community life and to actively seek ways to engage with one another in constructive, uplifting ways. As we face ongoing challenges, Hudson’s insights serve as vital reminders that civility is not merely an aspiration but a necessity for a healthier, more interconnected society.