5 Ways to Avoid Political Tribalism

You hear it all the time: things have gotten too tribal in American politics. It might make you want to run the other way. Some of those leaders you once  admired have gone off the deep end, drowning themselves in partisanship over principle. Or you are so disgusted by the “other side” that just reading the latest news of their antics causes your blood pressure to rise. 

But as privileged as we are to be citizens of the United States, it’s not right to sit on the sidelines. We need healthy participation in politics — a restoration to sanity and fair-mindedness, honesty and integrity. If those you see in the spotlight aren’t doing it, it’s up to you to be a part of the healthy change that can ultimately help us all. 

How do you participate in politics without becoming tribal? How do you stand firm in your beliefs without demeaning those who stand opposite you? It can be a learned art and it’s worth the time to develop such a skill. I describe 5 ways you can practice healthy political participation without making enemies or losing friends — and maintaining your dignity in the process. 

1. Basic rules of communication apply. If you’ve ever been to therapy — especially couples therapy — you know how important it is to genuinely listen and make others feel heard. This is extremely important in political dialogue as well. You can be firm in your position, but taking time to listen to those with another viewpoint shows respect. You may not change your mind, but it’s possible you’ll better understand them and in doing so, incorporate that into future analyses of a variety of issues.

2. Read widely. Most of us are going to consume more of one viewpoint than another. It’s okay to stick to your favorite reads, but make a conscious effort to include at least one counterview or publication when making decisions or speaking out on a particular issue. Often, there are things you haven’t considered or good points to be made that your typical publications aren’t covering well. Even if that’s not the case, you come away with a better understanding of why individuals with different opinions think in the way that they do. This helps you remain grounded and to cultivate better arguments for what really matters.

3. Consider humanity. It’s easy to demonize folks who rioted in Kenosha or carried out the January 6th intrusion into the Capitol, but remember that each and every one of them is a human being with a history of trauma, love, abuse or a personal story of some kind that led them there. Their actions aren’t okay, but seeing beyond their destructive actions can help you remember the pain behind it and seek potential solutions that can work for everyone.  It’s when we lose sight of the humanity of others that we begin to coalesce in tribes that are out to harm one another, rather than find common ground.

4. Refuse to participate in partisan bullying campaigns. Whether it’s calling religious conservatives bigots or trotting out “Let’s Go Brandon” chants at a rally, such immature displays push people further apart and contribute to a tense atmosphere where little gets accomplished. It might be refreshing at times to gather with folks who believe the same way you do but it’s ultimately destructive and doesn’t help our democracy. Bullying is beneath us. Stick with conversing about the best arguments from the other side and elevate the dignity of the issues themselves.

5. Call out bad behavior equally. Republican or Democrat — there are corrupt politicians and people on both sides of the aisle. Too often, however, we see media or political parties unfairly highlighting those they don’t agree with while skirting around those they do. When those in your own party get a pass, it’s a lose-lose for the character of the nation as a whole.  Be firm in calling out those on your side when it’s merited. That’s one way to gain respect and be taken seriously. It also keeps you accountable when it happens again and each time you stand firm, you draw others back to solid ground to stand with you. 

Refusing to be lured into tribalism is the best way to prevent toxicity in politics. Those with the loudest voices may call you names just for standing your ground. It’s possible you’ll be disinvited to certain groups or disrespected by others. But the more people intentionally separate from those creating political chaos and division, the more we will see the health of our political space in the United States begin to improve.